Turning Workplace Tension into Teamwork

Turning Workplace Tension into Teamwork: Stoic Tips for a Smoother Workday

Ever catch yourself saying, “I hate working with that crew; my team just clicks better,” or “I hope he’s not in today—I can’t stand that guy”?


Yeah, we’ve all been there. It’s totally normal to have coworkers who just rub you the wrong way. Maybe it’s their personality, how they work, or just a gut feeling that makes you dread spending your day around them. But here’s where Stoicism gives us a different way to look at things.

Stoicism isn’t about changing other people or the situation around you; it’s about changing how you respond to it. Marcus Aurelius, one of the big names in Stoicism, said it best: “You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” So, what does that mean when you’re stuck working with someone you don’t like?

First off, realize that those negative feelings are something you can control. Sure, it’s easy to blame someone else for making your workday miserable, but the truth is, your reaction is on you. If you shift your focus from what you can’t control—like your coworker’s behavior—to what you can control, like your own attitude, you’ll feel a lot more in charge of the situation.

Next, try flipping the script. Instead of seeing this coworker as a thorn in your side, think of them as a chance to practice patience, tolerance, and understanding. Every time you deal with them, it’s an opportunity to flex your Stoic muscles. And while you’re at it, why not try to get to know them better? A little small talk might go a long way. Who knows, you might discover they’re not so bad after all.

And don’t forget, Stoicism values working together and getting along. You don’t have to be besties with everyone at work, but you can aim to be effective teammates. Focus on the job at hand, not the personal differences, and you’ll find it’s easier to keep your cool and get things done.

I get it—that all sounds nice on paper, but what do you do when you still can’t stand the guy and it’s dragging down your day? Let’s talk about putting this Stoic stuff into practice when you’re stuck in the trenches.

First, try to change what you’re focusing on. Instead of zoning in on everything that annoys you about this person, think about what you can control—your thoughts and actions. When those negative vibes start creeping in, remind yourself that you have the power to choose how you respond. It might not come naturally at first, but with practice, it gets easier.

Then, zoom out and look at the bigger picture. Why are you both there? Probably to get the job done, right? If you focus on that common goal, it might help take the edge off the tension. You don’t need to be pals; you just need to work together without letting personal stuff get in the way. Keeping your eye on the task can make the situation feel less heavy.

Finally, see this as a growth opportunity. Dealing with difficult people isn’t fun, but it’s a part of life. Each time you handle a tough situation with grace, you’re not just surviving—you’re getting stronger and building character.

And hey, remember that you have a choice in what you love or hate. If you decide not to hate the guy, you might just find things get a bit easier. Try some small talk, get to know him better—who knows, he might not be as bad as you think.

It might not turn him into your favorite person, but it will make you more capable of handling whatever comes your way.

Ready to transform your workplace dynamics? Start applying these Stoic principles today and see how shifting your perspective can turn workplace frustration into personal growth. Share your experiences in the comments—let’s tackle these challenges together!

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